Writing to describe

Preparation and Planning

There is little preparation for this lesson. Students need to be given the option to bring in 'polar' props (e.g. heavy jackets, snow boots, sunglasses, ear muffs, packets of chilled or frozen food to simulate temperature, etc). Be creative to try and recreate the experience of the chilling environment and physical challenges. When simulating the process of carrying heavy equipment by giving each other piggy backs, you will need to be conscious of any health and safety risks or students who have medical issues or disabilities. In lieu of the piggyback, students could hold or drag something heavy. All desks should be cleared or you could use outdoor space. You will need to decide on activities that are appropriate for your students' abilities and class behaviour as the exercises will need to be strictly and safely controlled to gain maximum benefit.

You will need to make enough copies of the Student Worksheets for each student as the exercises are for independent study. You will also need ICT access so you can play the Audio and Video.

In Episode 5, the students are required to assess each others' work against an examination marking criteria so you will need to prepare this in advance.

About the MOD Topic

Lt Polly Hatchard RN is an engineer in the Royal Navy. She became the first female in the British military to reach the South Pole on 1st January 2007. Dealing with temperatures of minus 50 degrees Celsius, Polly trekked 182kms (113-miles) and then stripped down to a bikini when she reached the South Pole in aid of Breast Cancer. The expedition also marked the centenary of Sir Ernest Shackleton's failed attempt to reach the South Pole in 1907. He famously said after, 'Better a live donkey than a dead lion.'

Polly's two team mates were not Royal Navy Officers. Carolyn and Fiona were novice explorers who were battling breast cancer and decided to take on the challenge to raise money and awareness for Cancer Research UK. The team flew to their Antarctic base camp at Patriot Hills. They were then flown onto latitude 88'23'S where they began Shackleton's unfinished journey. For seven days they lived under canvas and towed sledges of supplies across ice fields and glaciers, finally climbing to the polar plateau at almost 3,000m (10,000ft). A map of their journey is presented on Slide 9.

Here is a taste of Polly's story that is sure to engage your students and provides a thrilling context for them to write a descriptive diary entry:

'Antarctica is a seriously tough and challenging environment, of which I am very respectful. Temperatures get so cold that the hairs inside your nose freeze and if not disciplined enough to breathe out through your nose you risk frost bite to the tip. Wind speeds get so high that a glove, tent or top not secured properly is gone forever in a flash. And the atmosphere gets so dry that you feel like you've been smoking 40 cigarettes a day or just stepped out of a nightclub. A single careless moment can cost the life of a finger, toe or worse still, you. I experienced temperatures down to minus 41 degrees Celsius but with wind speeds sometimes gusting to 25 knots the wind chill factor was well below minus 50 degrees Celsius. I am thrilled to have reached the South Pole, not only for myself and the members of my team but to bring the awareness of breast cancer to thousands of women and in the Centenary year of the incredible explorer Sir Ernest Shackleton' Lieutenant Polly Hatchard RN.

NB. 1 knot equates to 1.152 miles per hour (mph) and 1.85 kilometres per hour (kph).

During the time that Polly was in the Antarctic, HMS Endurance was deployed to the area (see Video 1). HMS Endurance is the Royal Navy's sole Ice Patrol Ship. She deploys each year in the autumn from her base port of Portsmouth in Hampshire, to the cold and ice of the Antarctica austral summer where she carries out her operational duties for the Foreign and Commonwealth Office, the British Antarctic Survey and the United Kingdom Hydrographic Office. Scientists are permanently based in the Antarctic and the Royal Navy works closely with them. The aim of the Royal Navy's exploration work in the Antarctic is to increase everyone's knowledge of the environment as a whole. The first British male to reach the South Pole was Captain Robert Falcon Scott RN (Royal Navy) in 1912 and the Royal Navy have continued to explore the continent ever since. This activity is just one demonstration of how the Royal Navy contributes to helping our wider world beyond their traditional military capabilities. On Student Worksheet 1, there is a blog extract from the Captain of HMS Endurance.

Further Opportunities for Learning

Students develop their written piece further. They pick one phrase from the piece and rewrite it using the targets set by their peer assessor to assist.

Turn the descriptive diary extract into the beginning of an adventure story set in the Antarctica and written in the third person. Consider how descriptive writing can be used to highlight elements of writing to entertain.

Research poetry written about the Antarctic and compare the poets' descriptive writing with the emotions that were described by Polly and imagined by the students.

Two Defence Dynamics lessons feature activities that will enhance your student's appreciation of this topic. Citizenship (Taking Action) uses Polly's experience to encourage students to plan a campaign to support a local issue or charity. Science (Homeostasis) uses the extreme weather conditions of the Antarctic and Polly's physical reactions to the environment to teach students about homeostasis. See links to other lessons.

Useful links:
Breast Cancer and Polly's awareness campaign: http://www.cancerresearchuk.org/breastcancer/jointogether/fundraisingideas/
MOD press release: http://tinyurl.com/595vr9 (copy and paste)
Antarctica: http://www.antarctica.ac.uk/index.php
HMS Endurance: http://www.visitandlearn.co.uk/default.aspx

Ask students to read the attached news article – Panthers sprint to victory. Half of the class could then be instructed to use the news article as stimulus for their piece of descriptive writing whilst the others use Polly Hatchard's experiences. Once they have completed this put the students in pairs and ask them to compare their pieces of writing.

Student worksheet answers

Download the teachers notes PDF to access the answers for this lesson.